Day 54

It's Christmas Eve, and Holden's already gotten one of his gifts- just a little early. We loaded up IV's and portable monitors in a wagon and set out to look at the trains. We took him for a spin around the unit first, to make sure he would be stable enough for the big trip downstairs. Along the way, we saw most of his fan club (consisting of doctors, nurses, NP's and techs), and he charmed everyone with his sweet grin. He was pretty happy to be out of his room... I would be too, after spending two months within the same four walls! His reaction to the trains was more wide-eyed wonder than smiles, but he had probably forgotten there was a world outside of room 3. :)

He continues to do well without respiratory support, but he still has digestive issues. He's gagging and throwing up, and having really loose stools. We're still pushing forward with the feeds (which are going ND now, thanks to Holden's helpful assistance last night), and we're just going to keep pushing until he becomes symptomatic again. Which hopefully won't happen... I'm about ready to blow this popsicle stand!

One of the doctors, Dr. Clay, brought Christmas dinner in for the families here tonight. While I probably won't actually eat any of the food (since Holden has once again boycotted sleep), I still think that is so incredibly generous of him. It just shows again how caring and kindhearted the people who work here are. We are amazingly lucky to have this team working with us to get our baby back.

I can't believe that Christmas is really here, and we are still here... I never saw this coming when we checked in for his surgery so many weeks ago. Honestly, I'm ready for a new year. This year has been a roller coaster of the highest highs and the lowest lows, and we're ready to get off the ride now. I try to remind myself daily of one of the most important lessons learned- Perspective is everything. I have two beautiful daughters who are smart and funny and kind. My son is alive and recovering, even if slowly. And someday, whether it is next week or next month or next year, we will get to take him home. WE ARE BLESSED. The coming year will be a year of continued miracles. Of changes, and victories. Of JOY. I'll look for it everywhere, in everything I do, every day. Because you usually get what you expect out of life, right? :)